Though a traditional, innocuous sitcom in many ways, “Modern Family” is still hip to many trends in modern entertainment. In the spirit of shows like “How I Met Your Mother” and “Parks & Recreation,” the Emmy-winning sitcom presented a viral-friendly “list” in Wednesday’s episode.
Similar to previous sitcom sensations like “The Bro Code,” “The Playbook” and “Tom Haverfoods,” “Modern Family” introduced a book of “Phil’s-osophy” in the first of Wednesday’s two installments. The list, a collection of life lessons penned by Ty Burrell’s character Phil Dunphy, was given to his daughter Haley as she entered the world of college and, essentially, adulthood.
Bits of “Phil’s-osophy” included:
— Always look people in the eye, even if they’re blind. Just say, I’m looking you in the eye.
— If you get pulled over for speeding, tell the policeman your spouse has diarrhea.
— You only get one chance at a first impression. I suggest Julia Child because it’s easy to do. “Save the giblets!”
— The most amazing things that can happen to a human being will happen to you if you just lower your expectations
— Dance until your feet hurt. Sing until your lungs hurt. Act until you’re William Hurt.
— Take a lesson from parakeets. If you’re ever feeling lonely, just eat in front of a mirror.
— Never be afraid to reach for the stars, because even if you fall, you’ll always be wearing a Parent-chute™.
— Marry someone who looks sexy while disappointed.
— Older black ladies make the best iced tea.
— Success is one percent inspiration, ninety eight percent perspiration, and two percent attention to detail.
— You can tell a lot about a person from his biography.
— Watch a sunrise at least once a day.
— If you love something, set it free. Unless it’s a tiger.
— If you’re ever in a jam, a crayon scrunched under your nose makes a good pretend mustache.
— When life gives you lemonade, make lemons. Life will be all like WHAAAAT?