Fans of British pop star Cheryl Cole can breathe a sigh of relief–her dismissal from FOX’s US adaptation of “The X Factor,” no matter how humiliating in theory, is handled with grace, if not surprising minimalism, in Wednesday’s premiere.
Cole is portrayed with no less dignity than her colleagues Antonio “LA” Reid, Simon Cowell and Paula Abdul at the start of the show, and when it comes time for the footage with replacement Nicole Scherzinger, the premiere focuses on the addition of Scherzinger rather than the subtraction of Cole.
But those hoping the premiere footage will vindicate Cole of the vast criticism that played into her departure should probably not hold their breath. Her presence in the first hour of Wednesday’s premiere–the Los Angeles portion–cements the fact that “The X Factor” made the right call in looking elsewhere for its fourth judge.
Granted, the idea that Cole was held under such a harsh microscope is somewhat unfair. She, more than virtually everyone in the world, has a look made for television–she’s stunningly beautiful and not just in a way that would appeal to the horny male demographic unlikely to watch a music reality series. She’s no icon, but she does have a legitimate track record as a successful pop artist.
Most importantly, her experience is about as relevant as anyone could ever have–she judged on the UK version of “The X Factor!” Save for the overblown concerns about her accent and the occasionally-misleading trade journal reports about some past incidents, Cole, in principle, gave critics no reason to doubt her ability to succeed on the US show.
Yet insofar as Cole was virtually unknown to American audiences (and even to some powerhouse critics who should be expected to know her), she was going to need to prove herself. And sources aware of the circumstances behind her departure had maintained that she failed.
Now that the footage is available for critics and about to air for an audience FOX hopes will be in excess of 20 million, the gossip is no longer necessary. Reality has checked in, and unfortunately, it backs up the idea that Cole was simply not a fit.
From the very moment she starts giving criticism, Cole showcases an utter dearth of confidence and comfort. Her lines, as simple, ambiguous and inoffensive as they are, seem like they require an excess of effort just to get out. Her facials and personality are far too understated for a major television show–especially one filmed in front of an arena-sized audience–and she is so stiff in her commitment to “not screwing up” that the ideas of bonding with and relating to her fellow judges seem completely foreign.
Her accent is never the problem–the Geordie accent is not one that specifically “pops” with American audiences, but nothing she says is remotely difficult to understand. The problem is her presence–she, as a judge and eventual mentor, seems less confident, comfortable and star-like than half the contestants on stage. How can she be a driving force on FOX’s most important television launch of the year?
At one point, Cole says something in the vein of, “I’m not sure if I really, really loved it or really, really hated it”–a very cliched, obvious line for a reality competition judge. Yet it doesn’t roll off her tongue–she stumbles through it as if it was the most edgy thing she’s ever said. She simply doesn’t project ownership of the room, the camera or the concept.
If asked to give a positive description of Cole’s judging, the word that would come to mind is “adorable.” That simply is not what “The X Factor” needs from one of its judges.
But before Cole’s fans get up-in-arms about the criticism, it is important to consider that how difficult it would have been for Cole, even on her best day, to truly excel within the confines of this particular judging panel.
As the big, contrasting personalities, Simon Cowell and Antonio “LA” Reid book-end the panel. Simon is the showman–the person who delivers lines and criticism that, while on-point, fuel soundbites. He also approaches contestants from a “do they have that unique quality from which we can create a star” perspective. Reid is the “businessman.” He’ll occasionally get a laugh, but he’s mostly very serious in his search for someone who is basically already ready to make a mark in the music industry and just needs a little bit of coaching and a big break.
Paula is playing the same role she played on “American Idol,” except she’s more lucid and more confident than she was on that show–especially during the later seasons. Her signature sweetness and naivete is there, but she’s also more pointed and objective in her criticism.
It is unclear where Cheryl Cole was supposed to fit. Had Paula not been there, Cheryl, perhaps if she got more comfortable, could have represented the pretty, sweet, feminine counter to the overbearing Cowell and Reid. But she is there–and she’s there with far more confidence and far more rapport with American audiences than Cole. Even if Cole was less timid and unsure in her judging, she would still be sitting alongside the person better suited for that “role” and thus rendered effectively worthless.
Reality competition judging is not arithmetic–you don’t need two empathetic women just because there are two aggressive men.
Nicole Scherzinger, Cole’s replacement, can also seem somewhat superfluous at the table.
Adhering to a judging style very similar to that of Jennifer Lopez on “American Idol” (minus the apparent issues with certain contestants), Scherzinger carries herself well, but she plays everything safe. Substantively, her comments are not much better than those of Cheryl Cole–the advantage is that she is looser, more fluid and more confident. She speaks in an overly-affected inflection. She knows when to deliver an overexaggerated facial expression. She can turn on the emotion and the over-the-top “your talent is why I do what I do” comments. She at least shows signs of interaction and relationships with the other judges. She fits in.
But none of that means she is needed. Not once in the ninety minute screener provided for critics does Scherzinger elicit a reaction like “Wow, thank God Nicole brought that up” or “This panel would not be the same without her.” She, like Cheryl Cole, is ultimately filler. It’s just that she’s more poised, more confident filler.
Viewers who spent nine “American Idol” seasons enjoying Simon Cowell’s candor and trusting his opinion are going to do the same on the new series. Viewers who respect Randy Jackson’s confidence but wish he would be more consistent, direct and serious with his criticism are going to enjoy Antonio “LA” Reid–he reveals what judges like Steven Tyler never understood: if you want audiences to actually take your opinion seriously, you have to dish out your criticism and praise wisely. Everyone knows how they will react to Paula Abdul.’
It is a near definite that Nicole Scherzinger will not be praised as the “best judge” or “the reason to watch the show.” But as a charismatic television presence, she’s less likely than Cheryl Cole to elicit “what is she doing here” reactions, even if that question is not entirely off-base.
The X Factor premieres Wednesday, September 21 at 8PM. Headline Planet’s “before it airs” review of The X Factor season premiere is available here.
